Mommy plus Five

My 365...

"This is not about YOU!!!"

Have you ever wanted to shout that from the mountain tops?  Have you ever wanted to shout that to yourself?

I have, and I do.  I experienced something last night, and again today, that refers to that very thing.  Two completely unrelated situations, triggers, moments, people, that left me feeling heavy, dark, sad, confused, off center.

I will admit, I am a very sensitive person who takes everything personally.  There is nothing wrong with that...unless it also opens the door for other people to crush your spirit and throw their negativity, their toxicity, their hatred and THEIR anger in your general direction.  Happens all the time.  But here is the thing....

STOP!

That anger, that toxicity, that negativity, that hatred, is not mine.  I don't own it, I don't want it, I did not cause it...it is YOURS.  Keep it.  My world is too beautiful to make room for your ugly.  Does that mean I do not love you?  No, that means I love me too much to live life on your terms.  I love me too much to waste one second of my life in your darkness.  It is ugly there.  It is cold there.  It is scary there.  There is no reality there.  And I do not belong.  If you choose to remain, you do so alone.  It is your choice, and it is your burden.  No amount of loyalty, genetics or familial obligation, is going to change that for me.

It is funny, I literally have to stop what I am doing, stand up from my chair, push away from my desk, "Do the Hokey-Pokey", then turn myself around.  Breathe in....breathe out....ahhhhh, all better.  Go ahead and laugh, I  actually do that.  :)

I choose the light.  I choose hope, future, happiness, optimism, joy, love...I choose me.

*exhale*

Thank you God for reminding me of this.  I feel so much better now.

After that experience this morning, I went into the kitchen and made a huge pile of pancakes and bacon, all the while singing to myself and remembering how awesome my world is.  The boys were thrilled with the pancakes and bacon....me, I was thrilled to have my perspective back.  That and the strength to recognize that it is what it is.  Amen!  And above all, I am so thankful to my boys for sharing their perspective with me.

Happy Sunday Planet!!

My photos of the day...

We ventured out this afternoon, just to go to the corner and capture some pictures.  I am really looking forward to blue skies again.

The mountain thief has not yet returned my beautiful mountains.  They are there somewhere...




 But even with all the smoke and gray skies, I still managed to find some amazing color.  :)



***Update***

Finally, a small patch of blue sky.



Music I am listening to today...Nickelback , When We Stand Together


Random Link of the Day...Bacon Double Cheeseburger Soup

The Daily V...You life, your world....own it.

Until next time...



Peace.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Love,