Mommy plus Five

My 365...

Garden fresh tomatoes anyone?

 I did not grow these "this year", a friend of Jack's did and was kind enough to share his harvest with us.  Hopefully next year we will have a harvest of our own.  No, we will!  These tomatoes are delicious!  So fresh, tasty and sweet.  I imagine this plate will be gone by evening if Blake has his way.  He loves tomatoes and will spend the entire day eating them whole.  I had a feeling that he would, so I have already carefully rinsed them off before plating them.

I had a much better nights sleep last night with no strange dreams that caused me to wake feeling disoriented and sad.  I feel really good today other than my right eye being swollen and red.  We have spent so much time outside this past week I am sure it is allergies.  Although why just one eye I have no idea.

I was thinking about my children this morning, the three that remain happily a part of our family, and I realized how much alike they are.  So loving and kind all three of them.  My eldest son does not have a mean bone in his body, and he loves his Kori and his pups so much.  He cares deeply about his brothers and I, and shows it all the time and I am so appreciative of his sincerity.  He is such a great guy, really and truly.

We worried so much about Case all the time.  He has dealt with so much in his young life yet just as is his older brother, Case is very plugged in to this family and sincerely cares about his brothers and I.  Every day he takes the time to hug me and tell me he loves me. "Are you okay mom?"  When he hears the phone ring I will often catch him looking in the room to be certain mom is not crying over the latest drama.  He worries about me.  With home schooling I have realized how brilliant he is as well.  There is a genius hiding in Casey.  He will find a subject that he is passionate about, and he will research it completely until there is nothing left to discover.   Every night when we sit down to dinner he will present a topic he is interested in.  Inevitably Jack will try to offer his own take on the subject, however Casey will bombard him with facts.  It makes Jack crazy, but I can not help but chuckle inside as I know Casey knows the facts well!  His father does not stand a chance against the knowledge and logic that is his son!  lol

Then there is Blake.  I think of all my children, Blake is the most complex.  He deeply cares about every single aspect of life.  Blake is very logical about things, but what makes him so different than the ordinary genius, he is extremely emotional as well.  He is always listening, whether it be the T.V. or a quiet conversation I am trying to have on the phone or with Jack, Blake will pause to listen when you least expect it.  Then he will take the time to rationalize the conversation, then later that evening at bed time he wants to review it all in detail.  He needs to "work it all out" in his own mind before he goes to sleep.  He is the king of "reverse psychology" at the ripe age 9.  He uses it at every opportunity he can, and honestly believes it will work on me.  It is so funny to watch him operate.  If I am working in my room, and he is in the front of the house in the classroom, he will insist I open my IM program on the computer.  The following instant message session will take place...

"Mom"

"Yes Blake?"

"Can I have a hug?"

"Yes Blake"

 That is my cue to assume the position.  I have to turn my chair to face the door with my arms open.  He will come running into the room and leap into my arms like a dancer into a partners arms, and celebrate his "air" time.  I keep telling him he is getting too heavy for this routine, but he refuses to retire it.  This will go on and on and on until I have convinced him that my arms are about to fall off!  lol  Silly Blakey, such a gift.

Wow, I do love talking about my children.  I wish I could talk about all five of them, but two have moved on so completely that I have no idea what is going on in their lives.  Maybe it is old age, maybe it is a defense mechanism of the heart, but I am finding it harder and harder to remember the good times with them and that makes me sad.  :(

They say there is no pain in life like the pain that a mother feels when she loses a child.  That of course referring to the death of a child.  I disagree.  I think the pain is worse when you lose a child not to death, but to life.  What I mean by this is that you watch your child walk away from you so abruptly and so completely and you know it is not because you wronged them as a mother, it is because you loved them too much and cared about their tomorrow.

Until next time...